Augustine’s Confessions. My Church History I class (Jesus to eve of Reformation) had an unusual syllabus. Get every single thing right on the tests and read all the texts, and you’ll get an A. Get even 1 question wrong, and you’re already down to an A-. But read Augustine’s Confessions, which will give you enough extra credit to make up that missed test question or reading, and you can get an A, provided you get at least 80% on the final. So I went a little overboard (by the formula, I only needed to read 100 pages of Confessions), and read almost the whole thing. I simply stopped when Augustine started to talk in allegory about Genesis 1, because it didn’t really add much to what I needed to know. I’m simply glad that Augustine came to faith and became the giant that he is known as of today by overcoming a major obstacle to his faith of a literal interpretation of Genesis 1 through the allegorical teaching by Ambrose of such an infinitely insignificant “doctrine” of exactly when God created the heavens and the earth.
Tangent on Creationism: Likewise, I do not care about exactly how old the universe is. I affirm that God created the heavens and the earth out of nothing at a single point in time, that Adam was a real human being, the first of many, and that what I believe happened in between those two events has absolutely no bearing on the issues of sosteriology. However, would I be preventing a potential Augustine from coming to faith, by being so dogmatic on something that is so insignificant by being a creationist who believes in the creation of the entire universe in 6 literal days, 6000 years ago? This is not the reason that makes me reject creationism, but is certainly a undesirable consequence of an idea that I had already chosen to reject, and is also the reason why I chose to begin to care.
I’m not a creationist, but I also do not read Genesis 1 as an allegory. I’m a progressive creationist like John Piper who hold that the age of the universe and the earth can be as long as it needs to be , that God created the elements of the universe ex nihilo, out of nothing (be it billions of years or otherwise, as determined by scientific evidence), and then made/formed/fashioned the particularities of the earth in 6 literal days. So I hold on to the “day” which literally means a 24 hour day, reject macroevolution by natural selection, and accept scientific evidence for the age of the universe, which is constantly changing anyway, but is certainly longer than 6000 years. Light-in-transit theory by creationists, I believe, to explain how light from dead stars that traveled for millions of years before the universe even existed, really undermines the reliability of human senses and logic, which at its core undermines our ability to know truth, much less the teleological argument of extrapolating a divine designer from looking at the world and deducing design; if light, for example, seems to have been “designed” or certainly looks as though they have been travelling for millions of years, but really is a simple act of a transcendent being creating randomly, that is, outside of our logical idea of design, how can we even deduce that anything else in the universe, much less human beings who were created in the image of God, is designed? The famous argument about watch deducing a watchmaker, for example, can be used here. See a watch, deduce design. A dead star deduces a star that actually existed. Creationists are telling me no, it never existed, even though it looks as though it did. Well great, then why should I believe you when you say, “oh but look at everything else, can’t you tell by its existence that the universe was designed?” To which I would reply, “no, because you’re now telling me that things that seemed to have existed never existed.”
At least some creationists understand this difficulty. Dr. Russell Moore, Dean of the School of Theology at Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, for example, wrote after his visit to the Creation Museum, “I was pleasantly surprised that the planetarium exhibit acknowledges problems caused for any biblical historical timeline by the time it takes starlight to reach our field of vision.” In fact, I would say that Genesis 1:14 gives me more than enough reason to deduce the years since the creation of the universe by looking at the stars (And God said, “Let there be lights in the expanse of the heavens to separate the day from the night. And let them be for signs and for seasons, and for days and years). Again here, some creationists would say that “days and years” would mean more like “day of the Lord.” Oh ok, so that use of the Hebrew word “yom” for day is an allegory, but the use of that word anywhere else in Genesis is not? By the way, even creationists like Dr. G. Charles Jackson agrees with me in the interpretation of Genesis 1:14 means that the “sun, moon, and the stars were for [emphasis his] the telling of time, years, and seasons.”
At any rate, I underlined a bunch of stuff in Augustine’s book, and to get those extra credits I had to write on my reflections upon reading the book. So here are some primary source quotation from Augustine’s Confessions that I mentioned.
I did the same for Calvin’s Institutes, (about 400 of 1500 pages read). Again a bit of an overkill (probably needed about 150 pages to get an A), but I really enjoyed Calvin. That one will be published in the next few days.
Elliott Kim.
Christian History I.
Pages read: 39 to 358
Translated by Mari Boulding.
Augustine’s Confessions has been one of those books that was always recommended by others, and I’m glad I had this opportunity to peruse through its words. I can see why so many hold it to such high degree of admiration. I hope that one day I can achieve a similar level of reflection of my own walk with God and of the countless blessings that God has bestowed upon me in every single step of my life, from birth to death. What stood out to me the most is his utmost sincerity and honesty. He is so honest with the pride that he holds in his heart of his own intelligence, of wanting to be admired, and of wanting to persist in sin even when he knew that God existed. Although I disagree with some of the allegorical illustrations of Genesis 1 in his last 2 chapters, I gained a lot of insight from this man, and I highlighted some of the texts to reflect on them.
Who is there to remind me of the sin of my infancy (for sin there was: no one is free from sin in your sight, not even an infant whose span of earthly life is but a single day) (43)
The only innocent feature in babies is the weakness of their frames; the minds of infants are far from innocent. (46)
I wonder if Augustine believed in infant baptism would be enough for salvation?
Was I somewhere else? Was I even someone? I have nobody to tell me: neither father nor mother could enlighten me, nor the experience of others, nor any memory of my own. Are you laughing at me for asking you these questions, and are you perhaps commanding me to praise you and confess to you simply about what I do know? (44)
Am I to say that something I remember is not in my memory? Or am I to say that forgetfulness is in my memory for the very purpose of preventing me from forgetting? Either alternative is completely absurd. (253)
Woe is me, for I do not even know what I do not know! (305)
I sincerely desire to know about God. But I would profit more from simply admitting that I am a man, and acknowledging simply that God is an eternal God and I am a mortal man. “He who sits in the heavens laughs; the Lord holds them in derision.” (Psalm 2:4) I can only marvel at this omnipotent and omniscient God, of whom there is no equal.
Are any of us skillful enough to fashion ourselves? … Could we derive existence and life from anywhere other than you, in whom to be and to live are not two different realities, since supreme being and supreme life are one and the same? (45)
We can’t even create ourselves, and yet we make ourselves to be gods. We worship ourselves rather than the creator of all creatures, even when we know that we’re not even powerful enough to create ourselves. Our meaning of life is intertwined within God’s. Our finite lives are utterly meaningless without the mercies and grace of the eternal one.
What does it matter to me, if someone does not understand this? Let such a person rejoice even to ask the question, “What does this mean?” Yes, let him rejoice in that, and choose to find by not finding rather than by finding fail to find you. (45)
Rejoice with trembling! (Psalm 2:11). Fearing of the Lord is beginning of wisdom (Psalm 111:10). I fear the Almighty Lord and tremble in front of him and rejoice in that he who is so mighty has called upon me as his inheritance. Oh God of Israel, oh my God, give me the wisdom to know that to know you and to honor you is to gain (Philippians 1:21) , and to not know your glory that is beyond my wildest imagination is also to gain.
Far more useful, then, were those studies than others in which I was forced to memorize the wanderings of some fellow called Aeneas, while forgetting my own waywardness, and to weep over Dido, who killed herself for love, when all the while in my intense misery I put up with myself with never a tear, as I died away from you, O God, who are my life. . What indeed is more pitiful than a piteous person who has no pity for himself? I could weep over the death Dido brought upon herself out of love for Aeneas, yet I shed no tears over the death I brought upon myself by not loving you. O God, you are the light of my heart, bread for the inward mouth of my soul, the virtue wedded to my mind and the innermost recesses of my thought; yet I did not love you, and breaking my troth I strayed away from you. (53)
If these tragic human stories – whether referring to events long past or fictional – are played in such a way that they fail to move the spectator to sadness, he walks out in disgust, criticizing the performance; but if he feels sad, he stays on, keenly attentive, and enjoys a good cry. So it is possible to enjoy sad feelings; yet there can be no doubt that everyone aspires to be happy. (76)
Augustine wept over a dying fictional character and yet shed nary a tear for his own dying soul. Am I not the same? Are we not all the same? Have I not wept over the meaningless things in this life while my soul deteriorated? Who am I that God is mindful of me, that God cares for me? (Psalm 8:4). I couldn’t even care for myself, yet God cared for me. Why? I did absolutely nothing to deserve God’s love, and did absolutely everything to deserve God’s wrath, yet he predestined his love for me before I even knew I was dead in my trespasses (Ephesians 2:1). I glory in this God of my salvation, the one I have the right to call upon as my God.
I was unwilling to be deceived, I had a lively memory, I was being trained in the use of words, I was comforted by friendship, and I shrank from pain, groveling and ignorance. (60) strike only to heal. (64)
The comforts of this world are so deceiving. Our strengths are indeed our biggest weaknesses, for we deceive ourselves by thinking otherwise. I pray that God will humble me, making me less of myself and more of himself, striking my sinful nature only to heal and creating in me a new heart (Psalm 51:10). I pray that he will be with me, even in the valley of the shadow of death, and even in the storms of this world (Mark 6:45) that he sends me through.
I rushed on headlong in such blindness that when I heard other youths of my own age bragging about their immoralities I was ashamed to be less depraved than they. (66)
I had no desire to enjoy it when I resolved to steal it. I simply wanted to enjoy the theft for its own sake, and the sin (67)
We derived pleasure from the deed simply because it was forbidden. (68)
Oh, total depravity of my flesh, I pray you will pursue no longer in what pleases Satan, but that which pleases your soul. Indeed, I am no better than Adam. The only true gift I have that Adam did not have is perseverance. Yet I have fallen just as he had!
Even ignorance or stupidity masquerades as simplicity and innocence, but nothing that exists is simpler than yourself. (70)
Your will is identical with yourself, and you made all things by no change of will whatever without the emergence of any volition which had not previously been present (336).
Ockham’s Razor would be proud. The simplest answer to everything in this universe resides in the creator of this universe, the simplest entity of all, my God.
When I studied the Bible and compared it with Cicero’s dignified prose, it seemed to me unworthy. (80)
“Go away now; but hold on to this: it is inconceivable that he should perish, a son of tears like yours.” (91)
She [Augustine’s mother, Monica] had now seen the wisdom of bringing to the martyrs’ shrines not a basket full of the fruits of the earth, but a heart full of more purified offerings, her prayers. (136)
They had heard their marriage contracts read out they had been in duty bound to consider these as legal documents which made slaves of them. In consequence they ought to keep their subservient status in mind and not defy their masters. These other wives knew what a violent husband she had to put up with… by persevering in devoted service, and by patience and gentleness, she won over her mother-in-law (225). [of Monica].
How many of my friends do I pray as Monica did for Augustine? Her prayers and tears are marks of a true believer who loved her neighbor as herself (Matthew 22:39). If I am ever blessed with a daughter, I may have a strong desire to name her Monica. She was certainly justified at a point in time by faith, for “we hold that one is justified by faith apart from works of the law,” (Romans 3:28) and that faith then led her to lead to others to Christ by setting a Christ like example, “for as the body apart from the spirit is dead, so also faith apart from works is dead.” (James 2:26) I hold that without works bourne out of faith, that faith was never a faith that justified.
Why follow your flesh, perverted soul? Rather let it follow you, once you are converted (103).
What is the mark of a conversion? See what part of my psychosomatic unity is in charge. Is it my fallen, sinful flesh? Or is it my regenerate soul?
A visible sacrifice is the sacrament, or sacred sign, of the sacrifice which is unseen… true sacrifice is any work which is done so that we may cleave to God in holy fellowship… when the soul offers itself to God in such a way that, inflamed by his love, it lets go worldly concupiscence and subjects itself to God as to the unchangeable pattern of its being, and hence becomes pleasing to him as sharing in his beauty, then the soul itself becomes a sacrifice. (113). City of God, X, 5-6.
God will not delight in material sacrifices (Psalm 51:16), only in the sacrifice of the broken heart, of broken spirit (Psalm 51:17).
By observing the succession of the seasons and by the visible evidence of the stars. (117)
The stars and the other luminaries in the sky are there to mark our times and days and years. (303)
The sky and the earth too, and everything in them – all these things around me are telling me that I should love you. (241)
“And God said, “Let there be lights in the expanse of the heavens to separate the day from the night. And let them be for signs and for seasons, and for days and years.” (Gen 1:14). Everything points to the glory of God, it is folly to believe otherwise, for “the heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork” (Psalm 19:1).
Unhappy is anyone who knows it all but does not know you, whereas one who knows you is blessed, even if ignorant of all these. (117)
Jesus + Nothing = Everything.
Everything – Jesus = Nothing.
I began to feel affection for him [Bishop Ambrose], not at first as a teacher of truth, for that I had given up hope of finding in your Church, but simply as a man who was kind to me. (131)
The most loving thing we can do to our brothers is to preach the gospel to the lost. But sometimes, we are so fixated on the proclamation of the message and lose sight of the message itself.
I heard some difficult passages of the Old Testament explained figuratively; such passage had been death to me because I was taking them literally. (132)
Even so, he held much of today’s orthodox views. Some say Augustine was influenced by Greek philosophy, but tell me, what part of his view of creation is influenced by Greek philosophy? Is it from his view of creatio ex nihilo? Certainly not!
I could not have preferred my condition to his on the grounds that I was better educated, because that fact was not for me a source of joy but only the means by which I sought to curry favor with human beings: I was not aiming to teach them but only to win their favor; and this was why you broke my bones with the rod of your discipline. (144)
Augustine here is talking about his academic pursuits, but I know for a fact that there is a huge desire in me to pursue the same in studying theology. I pray that God will lead me away from such sin.
The two women gave birth simultaneously, forcing them to assign exactly the same horoscope, even in the finest detail… I would either have to make divergent predictions in order to give a true answer, or else make the same prediction in the two cases and thereby speak falsely. (166-167)
Your best servant is the one who is less intent on hearing from you what accords with his own will, and more on embracing with his will what he has heard from you. (261).
Augustine here gives an extra-textual view of rejecting Astrology, and compares that with Esau and Jacob in the Bible. He’s starting to see how the Bible has been teaching the truth, even in such matters as astrology. In all matters, let God speak, and let us listen, that we may truly know the truth.
For it was necessary for heresies to emerge in order to show up the people of sound faith among the weak. (180)
The good derive from you and are your gift; the evil are my sins and your punishments. (240)
God ordains what is evil in our view to bring about good, even if it is intentional (Gen 50:20). I truly believe that for the converted, everything that happens in their lives is a blessing, regardless of whether we realize it or not.
Victorinus… in recognition of his distinction as a teacher a statue had been erected to him in the Roman forum, which was a very high honor in the eyes of worldly people, and one he well deserved. (187).
If he was not afraid to address crowds of crazy people in his own words, how much less ought he to fear your peaceable flock as he uttered your word? (189)
Unashamed of the gospel (Romans 1:16)! Victorinus certainly set aside the veneer of this worldly glory and traded it for the eternal mana. Such a prominent man did not shy away from the gospel, even if that meant ridicule among his critics. What then, do I have to lose, me of such low esteem? I hope that by giving up whatever that I have, I will be a model for others, as Victorinus was to Augustine.
Then I read, Let your anger deter you from sin, and how these words moved me, my God! (Psalm 4:4) I had already learned to feel for my past sins an anger with myself that would hold me back from sinning again. (216)
Although this is not an accurate portrayer of Psalm 4:4 (Augustine was working off a Latin Bible), I believe it is still theologically sound. Not only am I turning toward God, I am turning away from my sin. I am turning toward God out of reverence and love, turning away from my sin out of godly hatred.
The moment we knelt down and begged this favor from you, the pain [toothache] vanished. What was that pain? (218)
Augustine, of all people, who was not even years remove from being a Neo-Platonist, had no reason to believe in the supernatural. Still, he prayed for a deadly toothache to be dispelled, and he received an answer for his prayer. This a great proclamation of the power of God and the power of prayer. Why should I believe otherwise?
The first part I read of this book [Isaiah] was incomprehensible to me, however… (218)
I’ve been stuck on Isaiah for the longest time. I take some comfort knowing that even Augustine struggled with it his first time around.
What is a life of happiness? Surely what everyone wants, absolutely everyone without exception? (256)
We cannot therefore assert without qualification that everyone wants to be happy, because people who are unwilling to find joy in you, in which alone the happy life consists, obviously do not want the happy life (259).
Since they would not want to be deceived, are unwilling to be convinced that they are wrong. They love truth when it enlightens them, but hate it when it accuses them. (John 3:20; 5:35). (260).
I hate to be wrong, but I hate deception more than being wrong. I pray that others would believe the same, regardless of the cognitive dissonance of the sunk cost of having invested in the useless things of this life.
Give what you command, and then command whatever you will. (263)
Famous quote from Augustine. I should to pray the same.
Nonetheless when in my own case it happens that the singing has a more powerful effect on me than the sense of what is sung, I confess my sin and my need of repentance, and then I would rather not hear any singer. (270).
He laid them on his grandsons, Joseph’s children, not in the way indicated by their father, who saw only the externals, but as he himself judged to be right by the vision that guided him within. (271).
This tendency [pride] is one of the chief impediments to loving you and revering you with chaste fear, and therefore you thwart the proud but give your grace to the humble (276).
I am sorely afraid about my hidden sins, which are plain in your eyes but not to mind. In other areas of temptation I have some shrewdness in self-examination, but in this matter almost none. (277).
The one of the greatest mistakes we can make is to deceive ourselves into thinking that we are not prideful.
“What was God doing before he made heaven and earth?” But I will not respond with that joke someone is said to have made: “He was getting hell ready for people who inquisitively peer into deep matter” (294)
I would rather have answered, “What I do not know, I do not know,” than have cracked a joke that exposed a serious questioner to ridicule and won applause for giving an untrue answer. (294)
I boldly make this assertion: God made heaven and earth, he was not doing anything; for if he was doing or making something, what else was he doing but creating? (294)
What, then, is time? If no one asks me, I know; if I want to explain it to someone who asks me, I do not know. (295)
Augustine, the great rhetorician, gives me, a lesser mortal, to not be so prideful as to place pride of myself over love of others.
Succession of days is mentioned, because the nature of these things is such that temporal succession is needed in their case to bring about ordered modifications of motion or form. (320).
Even if Moses himself appeared to us and said, “this is what was in my mind,” we still should not see his thought; we would only believe him. Let us not go beyond what is written, inflated with pride and playing one off against another. (334) (1 Cor 4:6)
If we engage in hurtful strife as we attempt to expound his words, we offend against the very charity for the sake of which he said all those things. (334)
These debates about how God created the universe (and other areas of debate) is useless, and indeed detrimental folly if we engage in them not with love but out of pride. Simply trust in God.
You, Father, made heaven and earth in that Beginning who originates our wisdom, that is to say in the Wisdom who is your Son, coequal and coeternal with yourself. (345).
How often do we speak of the Son as the wisdom? “O Lord, how manifold are your works! In wisdom have you made them all.” (Psalm 104:24).
The triad I mean is being, knowledge, and will. I am, and I know, and I will (349).
Allegorical illustration of the trinity to human beings, since we are made in God’s image. I’m not buying it yet, though.
Let there be light; repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near, repent, and let there be light. (350).
First words of God, first words of John the Baptist, first words of Jesus. The only way we can be reborn into new creation is to repent and receive the light of the world.